Sometimes people ask me how get “me” time, being a single parent and travelling so often.
The truth is, I don’t really believe in “me time”. It seems an awful lot like self-gratification – like saying, “I’ll be a good parent if I give myself the gift of a vacay from my family”. I don’t believe a parent has to be in the company of their child 100% of the time. As a matter of fact, as my children grow older, they have less need of my constant presence, and it’s satisfying to think that I am raising kids who are self-sufficient!
I DO often engage in the feeding of my soul. The difference, I think, is the focus, or intention. “Me time” is focusing on the “me” or ego, while feeding the soul is the intention of putting energy into building a healthy self. Aren’t they the same? I don’t think so.
Feeding of the soul encourages emotional, spiritual and mental growth, so that I have more to give and can be a better receiver. It makes me healthy. I pray, meditate, use affirmations and visualizing, reading / researching aspects or traditions of spirituality, take long walks, watch encouraging or motivational programs, and so on. It isn’t always about relaxation, but it doesn’t necessarily include a lot of wild adventure or glamour, either.
If I was engaging in “me time”, gauging from the way many people do, it could look a lot like escapism. That’s not me and doesn’t represent my lifestyle choices, or benefit my family. I don’t need to escape from my kids and I don’t want to vacation without my fam – they’re the coolest people I know!
Perspective and intention are really important and can lay the foundation for a healthy outlook on life…
An Albanian morning news program, Vila 24 on Channel 24, expressed interest in our family and over the course of two days last week filmed this 24 minute docu-interview.
We enjoyed the opportunity to discuss travel, volunteerism, worldschooling, foster care, and adoption and we were so glad to participate!
The intro and questions are in Albanian, of course, but our responses are in English with light voice-over Albanian translation, so the meat of it is understandable.
I hope you enjoy!
There are some really big words being used these days, and I don’t mean largewithalotofletters big. These words have a really big and powerful meanings and intentions behind them. For example, “bigot” is used more often than ketchup on fries. My social media feed is filled with accusations of hate, bigotry, stupidity, ignorance, misogyny, racism, radical, extremism, fundamentalist…the stories of heroes and love, intelligence, miracles, unity and selflessness are becoming fewer and fewer.
What does it all mean and how do I explain it all to my children? I have a lot of ideas and I’m going to share them (you knew that was coming, right?!). Maybe I will sound too “feel-goody” or maybe too simplistic, but I’m going to have a go at it…and I’m not very politically correct, so you can be assured that I won’t say anything because the masses tell me it’s the popular idea!
There is a very simple strategy behind my philosophy of life – I am free to think and believe anything I want and live according to those beliefs and my ideas surrounding my choices, as long as I don’t allow these to infringe on the liberties of others. My moral obligation is to allow others the same, and when my rights (or those of people I feel affinity for), are in jeopardy, I take action. That normally doesn’t entail name calling or misinterpreted use of words, no matter how popular they may be. If I do succumb to name calling, misuse of words, or fall into less than stellar behaviour, I take responsibility and do what needs to be done to repair it. Otherwise, I fight a good, fair, morally and ethically responsible, and legal fight to reverse whatever injustice has been rendered.
As to the use of all of these big words, I have taught my children to use a dictionary whenever someone begins spouting their political, religious, or whatever doctrine is popular for the day. They can then decide for themselves is making proper use of the words. If they are evaluate their statements and decide the benefits of the statements. If not, move on and do not give that person any serious attention. If a person wants to be taken seriously, they will at least use language that represents their ideas properly, not popularly.
Really, this is a very simple, practical position to take, no matter the topic. After all, a bigot is a person who is “utterly intolerant of any differing creed, belief, belief, or opinion” Dictionary.com, and not a person who just disagrees and / or shares their opinion (so check that this isn’t you and not the person being accused!)… and a misogynist is a one who “hates, dislikes, mistrusts or mistrusts women and not someone who disagrees or shares their opinion” Dictionary.com, unless that is actually the idea that is stated… a racist is someone who believes that “one’s own racial group is superior, or that another racial group is inferior to the others” Dictionary.com, not someone who simply disagrees or shares their opinion, unless that is the actual statement shared.